Who is Ted L. Nancy? He's a superstitious Vegas high-roller who wants to gamble at a casino in his lucky shrimp outfit... He's the genius inventor of "Six Day Underwear"... He's a stage actor who only travels while dressed as a stick of butter... He is, in reality, a twisted prankster—a supremely off-kilter alter ego who sends patently ridiculous letters to corporate honchos, entertainment conglomerates, national publications, politicians, celebrities and heads of state. His innocent requests, queries, complaints, demands, and suggestions are so absurd it is amazing they fool anyone—but often the deadpan responses he receives are even more hilarious: "Dear Mr. Nancy, It is not often that we receive such enthusiastic support for the paper bag." —The Paper Bag Council "On behalf of Greyhound, there should be no problem traveling while in your butter costume." —Greyhound Bus Lines "I look forward to working with you to create a better future for this great nation." —Vice President Al Gore Letters From A Nut is an insanely inspired, truly madcap collection of Nancy correspondence, a wet-yourself-in-a-public place funny aggregation of official—and officially certifiable—requests, complaints, fan mail and questions that could not possibly have been taken seriously...but, amazingly, were.
Welcome to the world of Ted L. Nancy. Some have called him inspired, some have called him a goofball, and many have wondered who Ted really is. All we know is that Ted loves to write and it shows-Extra Nutty! is chock full of nut, a record of real live correspondence from America's favorite pen pal to a cross-section of this great nation. Extra Nutty! is bursting with all new letters showing Ted at his looniest. Take, for example, this: Dear Business Permits Dept.: I want to apply for a business permit in your fine city...I operate the Soup & Sleep Restaurants. You can either order soup or sleep. A hostess will greet you and you would say, "I'd like to sleep." She will lead you to a table where you can catch a few winks. Or this: Dear Helena Ocean & Dog Licensing Dept: I will stage the play "Mark Twain with Tourette's Syndrome.". . . Let me know what arrangements I need to make to store my anchovie tank at your seaport. Thank you. I await large crowds. Or even this: Dear Kmart: I have invented a male underpants liner...This liner fits right in your shorts and can be thrown away after 15 weeks. I have been wearing the same pair of underwear for 105 days now and although they feel a little stretchy they are perfectly clean. Ted's unique way of looking at the world-and how the world responds to Ted's schemes--is captured here in this extra nutty, hugely hilarious collection.
Seinfeld. For more than 33 million viewers, the Emmy Award-winning television show has become a Thursday night ritual. Now, even though the show has ended, Jerry Seinfeld's distinct brand of humor can still be yours. Ted L. Nancy's first book, Letters from a Nut, with an introduction by Jerry Seinfeld, now has more than 225,000 copies in print. In More Letters From a Nut, master-prankster Nancy shares even more sidesplittingly funny letters he has written and the unbelievable true responses he has received.
He's back: the curse of customer service departments everywhere--Ted L. Nancy, letter writer extraordinaire whose imbecilic queries have a way of eliciting equally idiotic answers from some of the world’s biggest companies and dignitaries. From the bestselling author of Letters from a Nut comes the latest collection of seemingly serious but crazed correspondence. All New Letters from a Nut includes more than 200 letters, from bizarre to outright loony requests and compliments written by Mr. Nancy to Icelandic malls, German theme parks, shoe museums, foreign presidents, commode companies, waffle cone businesses, and the Hotel Del Fino in Greece along with their equally sincere but hilarious responses. With his previous books, Ted L. Nancy distinguished himself as America's favorite postal humorist. This latest compilation highlights his comic status through letters to an upscale Amsterdam hotel requesting a room for his 300 hamsters and him to put on his play HAMSTERDAM; to Vons Supermarkets complaining that their Diet Black Cherry soda is sending him paranormal messages; to Armour Meats seeking a 59-foot piece of bologna and a note to the City of Glendale, California, asking for help in starting his new comedy club, THE JOKESTRAP; and many more…. Throughout Ted L. Nancy demonstrates his genius for convincing people his absurd queries are dead serious, demonstrated by the responses he receives. All New Letters From a Nut is unabashedly silly, unapologetically sophomoric, and 100% funny. With a foreword by Jerry Seinfeld
The best-selling author of Letters from a Nut presents a latest collection of whimsical correspondence between the author and the unwary establishments, organizations and government offices that attempted to respond to such requests as a hotel room for 300 hamsters and a 59-foot piece of bologna.
A collection of letters purportedly written by the author's ancestors, from Adam and Eve's crotchety neighbor Larry complaining about their apple crunching through a letter from Funyun T. Nancy II to the Metropolitan Museum of Art alleging that his giraffe looks like Leonardo Da Vinci.
When a rainstorm prevents Nancy and her best friend, Robert, from getting to the planetarium the night of a class field trip, she has a brilliant idea for making things better.
THIS IS WHERE IT ALL BEGAN, when Ted Cruz rose and declared, "e;I intend to speak in opposition to ObamaCare, until I am no longer able to stand . . ."e; In the twenty-one hours that followed, Senator Cruz explained why ObamaCare is a train-wreck and a job-killer that must be stopped and repealed. Mike Lee contributed "e;a tour de force constitutional lecture"e; putting the Supreme Court's decisions concerning the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (aka ObamaCare) into context. Marco Rubio recounted his parents' pursuit of the American dream; and Senator Cruz urged voters to "e;Make DC Listen."e;
Small Schools, Big Ideas shows how the principle-based and equity-focused model from the Coalition of Essential Schools (CES) can be used to redesign existing schools and create new schools that prepare students for this century's challenges and opportunities. Filled with inspirational stories and illustrative examples from schools that have successfully implemented CES principles and practices, Small Schools, Big Ideas offers information and inspiration needed to: Transform schools in order to achieve equitable outcomes for all students Understand various school design options Establish school vision, mission, and goals to raise educational expectations and results Develop transformational leadership Cultivate a professional learning community Implement student-centered teaching, learning, and curricula Build productive relationships with families and communities Establish strategies for sustainability These recommendations and proven strategies can help educators transform their schools to become truly equitable, personalized, and academically challenging.
Thorns of the Rose" is a contemporary story of an unwed mother who has an eleven-year-old daughter born with spina bifida. Carolyn Parker, thirty-two, blames herself for her child's affliction. She believes her careless sixties lifestyle put Nancy in a wheelchair. Since birth, the girl has been hidden from all but her doctor, a few associates and close friends. Carolyn has scratched, clawed and worked her way to an executive position at a major San Diego ad agency in order to afford Nancy's treatments and therapy. She has built a wall around herself and her child. Except for necessary professional contacts, she'll have nothing to do with men. John Freeman, a thirty-six-year-old Vietnam vet, enters Carolyn's life by way of twelve-year-old Timmy Collins. The boy, hurting from his parents' recent divorce, runs on the beach with John and they've become friends. Timmy meets Carolyn first. She runs on the same beach. He introduces her to John. Sparks fly and the lives of all three, as well as Nancy's, change forever. The story is set in San Diego, CA in the spring/summer of 1978.
Ted Gross is the author or editor of nineteen books and numerous articles on literature and education. His major academic publications include Academic Turmoil: The Reality and Promise of Open Education, Dark Symphony: Negro Literature in America, and The Heroic Ideal in American Literature. In 2005, he published his memoirs, The Rise of Roosevelt University: Presidential Reflections. He has served as a faculty member or administrator at the City College of New York, the State University of New York at Purchase, the Pennsylvania State University, and the University of Nancy in France. From 1988 to 2004, he was president and chancellor of Roosevelt University. Since his retirement, he has devoted himself to fiction and has published five novels: Choices, Striver, Fidelity, CCNY—and Me, and Aging Beauty.
Tim Jenkins and Angela Gagliardi meet one day in college. They have different perspective regarding their friendship. He wants to marry her, but she has other ideas. Only time will tell if they can become more than friends.
Fidelity is a vivid description of a man's conflict between marriage and work against the backdrop of grand opera. Mark Feldman has a supportive wife, who wants him to succeed in his new career as vice president of development for the Chicago Grand Opera, but as she witnesses his passion become dangerously intense under the influence of the mesmerizing visionary, Gloria Winthrop, she loses faith in him and returns to New York to restore the career she has forsaken. Mark's own fidelity to marriage is tested as he must choose between a brilliant career and a durable marriage. This core conflict is set again the seductive, glamorous world of grand opera.
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