We kissed until it became necessary to stop so that we could breathe, by which time my lips were so swollen it looked like I'd been pleasuring a brillo pad. We grinned at each other again and I felt the urge to utter something brilliantly intellectual. 'Have I mentioned that I'm hopelessly in love with you?' Actress Sarah Sargeant has finally landed the perfect boyfriend. But as she leaves London for LA, Sarah finds herself morphing from the perfect girlfriend, baby voicing 'i love you's, into a nutty one who throws phones and screams a lot. Where did it all go wrong? Was it the photo of a semi-naked ex-girlfriend doing a downward dog she found in her boyfriend's filofax? Or maybe it's the steamy sex scene she films with the handsomest man in the world, ever. Laugh-out-loud funny and brutally honest, The (Im)Perfect Girlfriend is the story of one woman's search for her happy ever after. It is a novel that firmly establishes Lucy Anne Holmes as one of the best writers of romantic comedy today.
Why couldn't I have woken up still drunk? Waking up drunk is much more fun than waking up with a hangover. Then you can do the pint, fry-up, back-to-bed routine, which rarely lets you down. My extensive research of hangovers has led me to the conclusion that only two things can save you: 1) A small glass of port; 2) Sex. Both remedies are out of the question today because I drank all the port in the flat last night and I haven't had sex for 325 days." Sarah Sargeant has been single for three years and nine months. She has just spent five months plucking up the courage to ask out a balding man with a paunch who works in her local pub. The gentleman in question informed her that he would rather stay in and watch the Narnia movie on DVD. Her pride has not just been bruised, it's been disembowelled. And she vows it's the last time she will ever reach out to a member of the opposite sex. But her family and friends have other ideas. They enter her into a reality TV show against her will, persuade her to go speed dating and even more radically, they encourage her to start a blog. Suddenly Sarah Sargeant is on a mission. A mission to explore 50 Ways To Find A Lover. This is a debut novel for a new generation who want their heroine funnier, smarter, ruder - and more real.
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