Deborah M. Merrill's Books

Caring for Elderly Parents

Juggling Work, Family, and Caregiving in Middle and Working Class Families

By: Deborah M. Merrill

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Caring for Elderly Parents

Juggling Work, Family, and Caregiving in Middle and Working Class Families

By: Deborah M. Merrill

Based on open-ended interviews with adult children and children-in-law, this book documents how plain folk from the working and middle classes manage to provide care for their frail, elderly parents while simultaneously meeting the obligations of their jobs and their own immediate families. Adult children who care for elderly parents are pressured daily trying to juggle the responsibilities of work, family, and caregiving. Deborah Merrill shows how plain folk (as one caregiver termed herself) from the working and lower middle classes manage to provide care for their frail, elderly parents while simultaneously meeting the obligations of their jobs and their own immediate families. The evidence is drawn from open-ended, in-depth interviews with adult children and children-in-law, all of whom have worked outside of the home at some point during caregiving. Merrill examines the strategies that caregivers use to combine work and caregiving and the accommodations they make in their jobs. She also points to the pathways that lead family members to caregiving roles and how those pathways vary according to family history, gender, and in-law status. By focusing on class differences in caregiving and pointing to policy implications, Merrill has provided an invaluable resource for students, researchers, and policymakers in social work, gerontology, family studies, and social issues.

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Page Count

244

Publisher

Bloomsbury Publishing USA

Published Date

ISBN 10

0313388350

ISBN 13

9780313388354

When Your Children Marry

How Marriage Changes Relationships with Sons and Daughters

By: Deborah M. Merrill

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When Your Children Marry

How Marriage Changes Relationships with Sons and Daughters

By: Deborah M. Merrill

Marriage is an important transition in the life of any adult who marries. But often when a son or daughter gets married, their relationships with their natal families changes. It is often said that a 'daughter is a daughter all of her life, but a son is a son 'til he takes him a wife.' This book examines how marriage changes relationships between adult children and their parents and how this differs for sons versus daughters. Merrill considers the process by which men 'get pulled into' their wives' families and the ways in which men are sometimes more connected to their wives' families following marriage than to their own families. But what is it about a relationship with a son that changes when he marries? And why do daughters tend to stay closer? Why do mothers experience greater difficulty in negotiating relationships with married sons than with married daughters? Why do daughters tend to stay closer and maintain stronger ties to their natal families than sons do? This book answers these questions and offers advice for mothers on how to maintain strong ties with their children when they marry, negotiate relationships that may be fraught with new challenges, and accept changes when they happen. Sharing firsthand accounts from mothers, sons, and daughters, the author sheds new light on this neglected topic.

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Page Count

186

Publisher

Rowman & Littlefield Publishers

Published Date

ISBN 10

144221094X

ISBN 13

9781442210943

Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

Understanding the Relationship and What Makes Them Friends or Foe

By: Deborah M. Merrill

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Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

Understanding the Relationship and What Makes Them Friends or Foe

By: Deborah M. Merrill

We all know - have perhaps told a few - stories about mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law. It seems the stories are nearly always about relationships filled with conflict and abrasive words or actions. But why is this relationship so difficult? And is it always as bad as popular belief would have us think? Deborah Merrill, a woman's advocate and Sociology professor at one of our nation's top universities, has been studying the relationship for nearly a decade and, in this book, explains where the difficulty is rooted, how friendly pairs have made it past problems that surface between a man's mother and his wife, and how they became friends. Dozens of interviews with pairs of women made in-laws by marriage illustrate Merrill's points, from harmful ideas and actions to helpful approaches. At its core, this book holds that marriage requires the creation of a new and separate family, which requires changes in roles, as well as a redefinition of relationships. Hence, family boundaries need to be made permeable to allow for integration of the daughter-in-law, and to allow the son to create his own separate and autonomous family. Family members need to be aware of, and prepare for, this, says Merrill. That, of course, may be easier said than done. But dozens of women who have become friends with their in-laws — some so much so that they drop the in-law and just call each other mother and daughter — explain how they got past the old, popular notions and social structure, to create goodwill and grow stronger families.

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Page Count

225

Publisher

Bloomsbury Publishing USA

Published Date

ISBN 10

0313347220

ISBN 13

9780313347221

Mastering Menopause

Women's Voices on Taking Charge of the Change

By: Deborah M. Merrill

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Mastering Menopause

Women's Voices on Taking Charge of the Change

By: Deborah M. Merrill

Interviews with and case studies of women in the U.S., accompanied by research in this text, show how our perceptions, thoughts, and spiritual practices can help women through menopause without drugs and their potential side effects. More and more women today are seeking natural ways to cope with menopause, including through mindfulness techniques and Eastern practices such as meditation. Women of various races, ages, and socioeconomic status interviewed at length for this study explain their experiences, victories, and setbacks in their quests to overcome this natural but body- and brain-altering change. Complementing findings from her research with wider outside research, author Deborah Merrill explains how popular culture depictions, race, class, and education all alter women's perceptions of the meaning of menopause, and how those perceptions can complicate, exacerbate, or alleviate physical and psychological symptoms. She details the "medical view" that views menopause as a problem to be solved, rather than as a natural event. And, through women's words and case studies, she details psychospiritual approaches many are adopting to cope, instead of seeking potentially harmful medicines. Readers will find new insights, wisdom, and potential solutions in the array of voices, experiences, and paths taken and presented in this book.

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Page Count

208

Publisher

Bloomsbury Publishing USA

Published Date

ISBN 10

1440874727

ISBN 13

9781440874727

Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

Understanding the Relationship and What Makes Them Friends or Foe

By: Deborah M. Merrill

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Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

Understanding the Relationship and What Makes Them Friends or Foe

By: Deborah M. Merrill

Average ratings

N/A

Write a review

Solve jigsaw puzzle

Age

Page Count

225

Publisher

Bloomsbury Publishing USA

Published Date

ISBN 10

0313347220

ISBN 13

9780313347221

Book's by Deborah M. Merrill

Caring for Elderly Parents

Caring for Elderly Parents

When Your Children Marry

When Your Children Marry

Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

Mastering Menopause

Mastering Menopause

Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law

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